SHOTS - HUMAN TRAFFICKING

Note: Again, a long pending draft... When I reread these even I felt horrible... Don't ask me how or why I came up with these things.  And the truth is I do not know anyway that writing this could actually help anyone?!
How can common people stop any of this, or contribute in some way to stopping any of these things?
One thing we can promise ourselves is to make sure that the next generation is inspired to be good.


She tried to contain her excitement! She felt proud to be doing this, joining work on her 16th birthday...!!
Not many girls from her elementary school had survived unmarried and NOW she would work to support herself and her family!
She would be the son her parents had always wanted...until her little baby brothers were born that is but they are little and sick, so she could be like an elder son! 
She held on to her little sister with more resolve, the puny 12 year old hands gripping her tight in response.
They walked into the "firm" and were happy to see many girls of their own age or lesser.  She was glad her sister had someone to play with.
She was not sure why Chacha did not look proud or excited for them.  He smiled with resignation and relief as he pocketed the amount carefully and patted her head saying "we will save your little brothers don't worry"





Twins were such a rare thing as it is and both boys meant definitely good things to come.  She had seen it in happening in the past year.
Two of her sisters getting married to the old station master and his helper on the same day!  Even Arasi said everyone in the village were jealous of her family.
Then her father refused to give her away in marriage though she turned 13 last month...
AND NOW she was being allowed to go work out of town.
Kumar mama had made them see the possibility of her and latchumi supporting her family.  Of course dad got drunk silently and mom moved her big bellied frame as silently out of the house as she could with almost inaudible sobs.
She would take latchumi to a movie with their first salary.  They will eat one meal less to make up for the ticket.
The memories kept repeating themselves as it did almost every morning.
She tried to be strong as she walk to the dormitory where girls her sister's age lived and worked - cleaning and sewing for them - unless someone rich asked for one of them specifically. 
Or like her sister today, turned 12. 
May be she could bribe auto Ravi with a free round to help sneaking them out to a movie and back...




With this one, it added up to Rs.10000.  That would be more than enough to pay for everything.
She would need to hurry to send the money order in before evening - it was Friday, the busiest nights mostly.
Her calculations were interrupted by the discomfort of the mundane routine.
This one was always quiet and dissociated she recalled. 
She almost thanked him for the respite he gave her. 
Then she remembered and then it hurt. 
She swallowed her pride and shame.  Like everything else...




The 10 volunteers were all young men and women arranging the boxes all around for them all to pick one each when they left.
So she stood up trying not to shout at these "know it all" bunch of youngsters that had decided to educate the poor prostitutes!
Of course, one of the educated customers, or a TV ad, or a stray commoner uses one.
But they knew the reality even better.  Even the chatty Sekar had beaten her when she asked him to wear it once.
"We can suffer the disease than go through the beating everyday", she tried to maintain her tone.
She was angry that these young men and women who have probably never had sex yet, came to show them how they could be safe. 
After everything that had happened to them, why do they think AIDS was a big deal! 
She probably already had it anyway.




His friends had played a dare on him for his 20th birthday and he was not sure anymore why he agreed!
He was not sure if he was ashamed or horrified.
The experienced hands that were promised to initiate him belonged to that of an almost pretty 15 year old girl...
She did not even show any surprise at the sight of him.
He said "I don't want anything from you" but I will stay here for an hour so they pay you.
Her sly smile both teased him and thanked him.  He had his first crush and heart break at the same time. 
The NGO and the police received an anonymous tip that night.

A rant - Jallikkattu

I come from a family which is right leaning (although my father would never agree) and has always had great respect for the Judiciary in India. 
(I also have my own theories on why right leaning or why the Judiciary was so respected but this not the time and place for it so may be later.)

May be even due to this very reason, I never possessed any interest in Politics or current affairs unless it came close to my heart in some form, touched a nerve and/or I was simply too bored and purused the news.

The last few rulings (or not) and events though - I must say they have been a bit of a shocker!

Marital rape not covered under the act against Rape and Violence
---oh well, because that is an age old traditional institution that cannot be questioned or disrespected with such suspicions?!
---I came to know about this with all the debate around the Nirbhaya case.

Homosexuality is against the law as part of the unnatural offences
---oh, that!  That's because although it has always been around in our culture, it was never accepted as the "norm" (unlike marital rape)?!  So we will just uphold that as is, won't we?

No action against the Breweries and Soft drinks companies from using up our water resources to make their drinks even while many parts of the country suffer from draught!
because we just cannot halt production of organisations that keep the economy going?!
---The Maharashtra draught and all the articles around that - I think someone raised a question about the breweries at the time in one of the articles and it continues to be a constant nag at the back of my mind!!

Note: I do know that the Judiciary can only act when someone raises the case with them and I am not informed if 3) above was ever raised as one.

What is really up with us here in India?

We are in a chaotically beautiful phase here.  In the middle of a decade of transformation, of an identity crisis, where the "so called western/modern way of life" is heckling at all our present cultural and traditional practices.

A phase where people are constantly choosing what from our cultural and traditional past still is relevant to our newer way of life.

I myself live a life of an hypocrite sometimes, where even though I do not believe in so many practices but still end up being participating for various reasons. 
But that said I am very clear of what I do believe in, and what I don't. 

I have just evolved to know the difference in people - where and when I think my protests or confrontation would pay and where it would simply cause harm and pain achieving absolutely no gain for either parties involved.

This "knowing the difference" has brought me so much peace at the cost of not explaining my true beliefs or pretending to go through a few mins of some practice that I may not believe in.

This may not work for everyone and but has for me and I am glad for it.

I have strayed away a bit from the main point I wanted to discuss!!  On that note, this ban on Jallikattu has caught my attention due to having people around me that are passionately involved in protecting this tradition and voicing their protest!

"Neeya Naana" on Vijay TV once, quite a few months ago, had this very topic and brought in all the experts (Senapathy is a name that I do remember) that are actively involved in the case today, to talk about Jallikattu... and boy was I blown away!? 

The idea of "Madumeikkira payala!" was utterly crumpled and tossed out; I saw so many educated young and old, expertly explaining agricultural and socio-economic details that left me totally bought to the cause.

I recommend watching this show if anyone is interested. 

Now this and a few articles I shared on FB are just GEMS!  The most striking of this one for me is the evidence from Sangam literature, the Indus Valley seal and the description of the Event from the "Durai Kaalam".

https://thewire.in/19157/banning-jallikattu-will-decimate-indias-indigenous-cattle-breeds/

I wish we could see the arguments presented on both sides in the Supreme court.  My strongly instilled belief in Indian Judiciary tells me that if anything like these articles were presented as arguments in the court there would certainly not be a ban but only a Regulation for this sport!  Wonder what really went on in there.

To think about the real cause for this case - There are hordes of sports out loose that actually cause harm!  What about them?  Why this sport specifically is being scrutinized?  And the other question that nags me is why would they target Tamil Native breeds?  Given that UP and MP are much higher with their cattle and milk production ratios, have they been taken over yet?

Update:  I learnt from one of the videos that they indeed have been.  TN is one of the few states that still have a majority of the native breeds.

These questions are more of trying to prove if there is really an alternate motive to this Ban with the MNC's and taking over the world of cattle conspiracy in mind?  What is the argument for the other really?  I would love to get my hands on the court evidence and argumenbts if they are public!

An FB page had someone posting a wonderful summary with a reference to A1 and A2 milk and the background studies.  A quick search gave me this.  I am sure we can find much more detailed papers on these.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3475924/

There was one specific comment from one of the FB forum/conversations where the statistics provided (or not provided) was being questioned and that was simply intelligent questions that did not have answers.

The simple way to stop this protest and put sens einto the protesters would be to distribute this report and evidence is it not. They could seek the court's permission(if required) to make this documenbt public and make the protesters read those arguments?  So called ëducating the masses". 

If you truly care about the animals then reach out to the people that want to "cause harm" and give them your arguments, no....!!?    Not go door to door just publish your arguments online or in one of the national papers.  Nope! 

There are more and more articles, videos and recordings releasing day by day that simply educate why Jallikattu is important and what it stands for.  No wonder I support Jallikattu and the preserving of native breeds. 

If one were to suggest a better way to keep this going without the "harm"I am sure people would welcome it but that is c onspicuously absent from the arguments on the other side!

Sapiens: A brief history of Human Kind, a book by Yuval Noah Harari.....Has earned another fan

Let me just start with my conclusion - it is a great book and a must read for anyone remotely interested in History, Prehistory, Anthropology, Genetics, Natural Sciences, Philosophy, Human Rights, Animal Rights, Meta Physicists etc..,

Theologians or more specifically the religious, please keep away from it if you are fanatics.  Or should I say, you definitely should give it a read with an open mind (relatively) ?

Yes, that's how many fields it covers in its Venn diagram, showing the intersection of all these fields, comprising us, our lives, the bigger and more difficult questions from time immemorial.

As part of the conclusion let me also warn you that if you are seeking answers for these big Life questions (or even the small ones), no you will not find them there.  But that is the point!

This book charismatically states the whole of "Human" history and that of the world around us, from our perspective, with all its intricacies and shows us how everything is so interconnected. 
Although this is something most of us educated in the modern (western as Yuval might like to point out) education system, are vaguely aware of, even if we do not completely grasp the depth of it, is what this book gives us...the depth and perception that is required to see the Big Picture of Life as we know it.

It asks all the basic Big questions, What and who are we? Why are we? Where are we (less addressed in the physical sense and more in the 'timeline of life' sense)? Where would we go, what would be, and why?  And most disconcertingly, for us sometimes, the why not's

I felt transported back in time, to the days when I discovered that I was not crazy or dumb to be asking certain questions that I was.  Yes, it's true that 'partially educated' and 'inquisitive' are usually not a good combination, but that is how most of us "normal" folks  run most of our lives.

Such as, the time when I first read about Higgs Boson; I was probably 19 years old.  This was a time I was going through a frenzy to learn the chart of particle physics by heart.  Or rather, I was making a chart of all the "known" (or theorised should I say) particles in the known universe.  Not that my volatile memory held it for long or my poor & almost dysfunctional mathematical comprehension helped me understand the nuances.  But can't say I did not try!  Well, back to Boson, I was shocked to learn that my teenage question - what distinguishes Matter and Energy - that was dismissed or (ambiguously) not explained, was not, just a stupid question arising out of a brain ill suited to understanding.  But rather a question still puzzling the human kind and (like all questions ever are) VALID.

This time Yuval gave me a pat on the back and said, "see, you are not crazy nor alone to be suffering doubts and questions" such as
1)  about one's identities and nationalities in an increasingly global civilisation,
2) the conflict between passion and pride for a native language while repulsed by caste system although both are rooted in cultural identities,
3) the "agnostic"ism towards religion, spiritual and paranormal curiosities
are all not because I am not "FULLY"formed.  But are rather natural and healthy and already being discussed in full swing for many years now among "scholars". 
As a gene-obeying, evolution-complying, social "Human", yes this did comfort me, the fact that I am not alone (both literally and figuratively).

However, the questions remain to be answered.  The big picture is interesting, intriguing, fascinating, depressing all in various measures.  But that does not mean, we are doomed. The message is clearly optimisitic, with almost a hint of doubt, for the benefit of hindsight. 

The one thing that I did wish he had explained better was, that though climate change has happened all the time, and that we like all our predecessor natural beings are only contributing to it (albeit too fast and too destructive in our case), although we may yet survive and do something to help heal the world, we are STILL NOT out of the danger zone!  But this message, that he DOES leave, I felt, was not explicit enough.

My thoughts are hence, thus:

1) Yuval says, Climate change is not a problem in itself, it has always happened. True!

2) My thoughts on the lines of what he too said:

Ecological destruction is the main key issue but that too is probably "natural" in the evolutionary process, this time intensified by the fact of evolution having created a naturally selfish and destructive being, us.  Or may be all species are if you think about it, the selfish part atleast.

3) When I say evolution, I am taking the view that cultural and cognitive evolution which before Sapiens were not too great which are new in this age old process but still a "natural" factor although the end products of this may not be - such as missiles and factory emissions.

4) The problem with climate change and destruction is that, becase Humans are trying to retain the world as they knew it ('know it' would not be true for we have already lost some contemporories of ours, in the evolution speak - lookup the extinct specis from the not too distant past).  But from an evolutionary point of view this will never be true.  By this, I mean the world staying the same in someone's context!

5) Accelerated destruction and eco imbalance are a menace because, even if Sapiens -with our enlarged brains and extensive cognitive abilities- may yet come up with great advancements that would give us new source and let us construct a Noah's Arc to provide sanctuary to all the beings of the world, we still are in the danger of "YET". 

To put it simple, It may not happen before the events are set in motion! 

And that is probably the worst fear of all.

6) Evolution in itself might be changing (point 3).  From only genetic and organic, came cognitive and resultantly, (agri)cultural, industrial and now technological (r)evolutions!

This might be why we are changing from beings of US to beings of ME.  Whether or not it is a good thing, Yuval says - much like a musing elder - only time will tell.

7) All in all it is an exciting time to be living in.  I might even consider proliferation(!!!) to make sure my genes get to experience the changes of the FANTASTIC (not necessarily good) changes!!!
OR NOT, for precisely that reason!!?  What is after all My genome and My (extant) experience?

Well, in all, it was an excellent and enlightening book that keeps you hooked.  Not sure if listening to the audiobook somehow made it even more awesomatic!

Thanks to a friend (Sanjay, if you are reading this) for sharing his "read" on goodreads and thus introducing it to me!

Thanks for the book Yuval!  I am almost at once wanting to read Duedus and not... for what you might choose to tell us (or not?). 

Will I be similarly enthralled or disappointed?!  I suppose Time will tell?!! :)

Thank you for reading.  I would much appreciate, comments and conversations here, than on my FB post even if you found this through my post there.  Cheers!

Musings on FANDOM and the much expected journey...

My recent visit to Hobbiton- the icing on the cake of the little visits to LOTR book and movie places of NZ- prompted some thoughts... 

Hobbiton is obviously a "the destination" once in NZ if one is an LOTR fan.

And so it was, for us too.  LOTR was introduced to me by my brother when I was 15 when a bunch of us went to watch the movie "Fellowship of the Ring".  Of course I fell in love with Aragorn (and Viggo Mortensen) and he was the definition of "the man of my life" for my 15 year old self (and I fought over him with two other cousins of my age at the time).  I did not like Viggo Mortensen as anything outside of the role/looks of Aragorn, not even as himself when I googled him. :( oh and Gollum! I used to (still do sometimes) imitate/enact Gollum.  When Suresh gifted me the One Ring, I surprised and even spooked him with a "my precious... Gollum gollum" in Gollum vocals... :D a quite plump Gollum that made me though, he he!

The book is a different story for me... The first time I tried reading it was a #fail; not being able to go past the first 100 pages! This was back in 2007 and I was still in university.

I read it again much later, probably in the heights of joblessness of 2008 June - Sept break.

Having always been a fantasy fan, it was no surprise that I liked LOTR.  But I was not a fan in the traditional sense.  I never was - for anything - for that matter. 

I realised it when discussing Harry Potter books - which I read over and over again - with a dear friend (Lakshmi Ponnuswamy) and realised what a "fan" means.  I decided I would never be a "fan" of anything in that traditional sense where you remember and recall every minutiae of a book/movie.

But that is not to say I can't remember the events, characters and details quite well.  I just don't bother to remember them all and do not think it a sin if I forget something.

Fantasy and especially such a detailed and multi-layered epic such as the LOTR family of books, holds a very special place in my heart.  I too have had, no less than Elven dreams, trying to speak the tongues, (of course also trying to invent my own) when I was still smitten with the first read.

Visiting the WETA, (the studio that created many favourites such as LOTR, Avatar, District 9), the statues of the Kings, Gollum and Smog at WELLINGTON Airport.
Visiting some of the places where various scenes from The Hobbit were shot were quite an experience in that it would probably take another post to, if not for each spot. Oh and Avatar!  Can't wait for sequel(s)...!

Coming back to my experience in and at Hobbiton, it reminded me of..... how I was not a FAN. So many fans were feeling special just by being in the place that created Hobbiton for everyone, almost as well as how JRR would have wanted it envisioned.  For me though... it made me feel sad. 

Let me explain here, it is one thing to look at Mount Doom up close or go to the WETA studio and look at the gear or the graphic aids used, to look at the life size replica of your favourite characters.  It brings just JOY.  

But HOBBITON is just different (Atleast for me).  It's this perfect, peaceful and beautiful place, filled with happy people.  It's not hard to imagine but the movie did good by expanding on that dream with wonderful details and capturing the essence of it all.  And to go to the actual place to see where they brought it to life is a memory I will cherish, an experience I will remember. 

But that being said, here I was, looking at Bag End with no backend!!
Nothing except the door and the frame really.  That sort of killed me.  I could, in that moment, empathise with those kids that go through their "Santa is your mom" moment.  It was this bunch of highly skilled people working in a dedicated team effort and mounds of creativity, imagination; and I am sure immense FANDOM, that created this absolutely brilliant place that was only in the imagination of all those LOTR Fans and JRR's epic words till then.

And there, for me, was hard physical evidence of the fact that it was all NOT REAL.  It was NOT TRUE.   Of course I knew it all before.  But in that moment to actually see it all as a SET and be explained the details of how they painstakingly put together the magnificent piece of work-art, was this feeling of sadness that dampened and dripped on the feathers of the wings of joy and made it just float half heartedly instead of soar into the sky.

On the one hand, I was there, with one part of me being excited about being here at HOBBITON!  And the other half of me quietly withdrawing within myself into a deep corner with accusing teenager eyes. 

So instead of writing a piece of review on TripAdvisor - I am sure there are gazillion reviews already so one less is not going to affect people's decision if they already are looking for "reviews" to decide to go to Hobbiton - here I am lamenting a slight fraying in my dream fabric.  A must see if you are strong (fan) hearted unlike me.

No Blogger App on iOS App Store

Yes, this disappointment gave me more than good enough reason for me to pick the pen sorry phone sorry the good old laptop to express my horror at finding this out this morning!

I had deleted the Blogger App to make space for some music, assuming I could always download it again, as I usually do with several apps, to overcome the "16 GB woes" of my dear little iPhone 5, a gift, I have no mind to part with. 

Oh on that note check out this one if you don't already know - http://www.mophie.com/ - which is now available through the Apple website as well.

This morning having the initial symptoms of a writing urge (thanks to some inspiring writings such as http://www.sindhusankar.blogspot.com and http://www.raudri.blogspot.com that I read and re-read after a long time) I cleared up other clutter from my phone and went looking for the Blogger App via the Search on the App store.

Not finding it there I was confused and tried to find it in my "Purchased Apps ----> Not on this Phone section" list. I drew a blank when I could not find it there either and re-tried both ways before it stuck me as worryingly odd.

Googling the problem, actually brought this link up - https://productforums.google.com/forum/#!topic/blogger/DHXxVoEzMPU;context-place=topicsearchin/blogger/category$3Aios%7Csort:relevance%7Cspell:false

Apparently it's been out since Feb this year and I had not noticed it! (roll eyes: of course since I obviously did not look for an App that I already had).  I would have appreciated some form of notification via email or such from their users list!! (Ya I know I am traditional like that, expecting email notifications!!!)

There are NO GOOD FREE BLOGGER APPS on the iOS at the moment.  A big gap in the market and I am surprised there was no official announcement.  I understand the blogger user base, mostly personal bloggers, has waned and IS quite small in the face of worthy competitors such as Wordpress but it's always hard to face the truth as a nasty surprise!! (I could hear google and Apple going "You belong to a group of people that is so small that it is negligible.")

THIS got me back to the predicament of moving away from BLOGGER and even the whole argument of how (Personal) Blogging is dead, now that everyone prefers to go back to FB to like or comment where every blogpost is auto-shared to begin with, announcing to their "readers"!! 

Having successfully avoided or not seeing any new value in the Tycoons of the new age of always connected world, has contributed to me being a Tumblr (really any social network other than FB) retard and somehow denying the existence of the well established Wordpress!! 

I know! I know! I have considered Wordpress several times in the last so many years since BLOGGER started its slow decay but what can I say, the loyalist in me always reproached me into quietude!  Not really the AdSense loyalist, mind you, for I have made, not a single dollar from it yet, in all of my almost 7 years with it!  Ha! Beat that! :)

I even tried GHOST a few months ago and somehow did not think I blog enough to be paying for a blogspace.  May be I will make the move to Wordpress or a new Blog space.  Or not at all, coming across some new way to write/post that is not Blogging. No I am not talking about the microblogging platforms made for short attention spanns and word misers,  I am quite (unbearably sometimes) generous and find it hard as it is to cut short, thank you!

What do you think, have you found any other new ways of doing things around here? What BLOGGER Apps do you use on your iOS devices?









 

Oh get lost! But take my love with you!

Oh get lost!
But take my love with you!
when you walk all over me and leave me on the floor
I hate you from my heart, from inside my soul.
All that anger flowing and drowning me foul.
And that's when I lose it and let you go through the door
Oh go to hell!
And there trotts my heart, with a wagging tail...
That's when I decide to drown deeper but with my heart gone...
And the burden of my love for you following you out...
Leaves me so light that I float back right up...
The bouyancy of this ironic life...
And again my zombie mind shouts...

Oh get lost!
And still there goes...my life and love with you...!

Truths about life as a Gen-Y

Disclaimer:  All opinions expressed here are my own.  You are not obliged to agree with any of these.  Do not post hateful comments either.

Thanks to Aruna Narayanan for making me feel good by clarifying that we were Gen Y and not Gen X.

The most overrated in life as a Gen Y

30 years of age ---

30 is not a deadline (not any other age for that matter).

With my vicious 30 in the vicinity, I too am confronting the great fear.

Nope! 

Your metabolism, physiology and all other things that keep you in 'Young & Growing' probably changed a decade ago so don't even bother!

Wear it with pride, after all age is just a number...No!?

Sex ---

It is not as big a deal as one is led to believe.

Legal Adults - Check

Consensual - Check (also involves not being intoxicated while making the decision).

Protection - Check

Then it’s good to go.

Even to write this I am right now overcoming a mental battle against it but I know this what I have said is correct.
       

Unique ---

"Everyone is uniform in their aspiration to be unique and the fact they already are unique as with the rules of a multidimensional universe".
                                             ---Ujwala B Joshi   ;)

Social Media ---

Not being a social media omnipresence does not mean you are a recluse. 

Understand the objectives of being a part of each and pick and choose.  Get over it, move on!

  

Shape and size ---

Honestly!  It doesn't matter because you are Unique ;)

I am not talking about fitness here or health.  

Yes, I did have to think carefully to choose which  of these almost synonyms that I am to undermine the hyoe of, if at all it is.

Fashion ---

It is so subjective (it is a long list so I am leaving it for you to think about what is it subject to or subjective of) that it shouldn't be so uniformly hyped.

Caste and Religion ---

Choose to believe what you may. 

Debating about it is a waste of time.

Proliferation ---

Don't do it unless YOU/YOURS and ONLY YOU/YOURS want to.

IQ/GeekDom ---

Though these are truly two different things, people seem to think of them as synonymous and everyone wants to be one! 

Everyone of us is either truly one - in a subject of our interest - 

and pretending to be one - in common subjects of interest -

while also pretending not to be one when we truly are - if the subject of our choosing is not quite platable to the crowd we are in.

Sexual Orientation --- 

It's always been there, either accepted openly or practiced secretly.   It always will be.  

As long as it is as per Sex above it should be good to go.

The most underrated or valued in life as a Gen Y

Water ---

Conserve Period

Green Earth/Renewable resources ---

Educate yourself if you disagree or die trying.  There is no alternate reality.

Survival Skills ---

Learn to DIY as much as you can. 

Learn to survive.  For WINTER IS COMING…. ;) :P

The wonders of (Associative) Memory, Emotional Overwhelm and othertricks of mind:

When I was between 8 and 10 years old, I used to speak Telugu fluently. 

I can't string a basic sentence together properly, if you asked me now.

How we are adept at forgetting things more than remembering!!

I grew up with my parents being able to speak 4-6 languages each, none of which I was taught to speak (or read or write for that matter) except for Tamil and English.

But today, if some one talks in those languages I was exposed to as a child, I can follow the meaning of a conversation or at least work out the context of it.

I would feel as if I was invading the privacy of the people conversing.

On the one side I would be eager to know how much I could understand and on the other, I would want to stop listening.

An Associative Memory is when some semblance to an old (archived?) memory brings forth responses/reflexes that you were not aware that you could/knew.

Two of the aspects of this have always fascinated me more than the others, that arising from music and that arising because of scent or odour.

Note how I said Music specifically and not auditory in general. 

Yes, I know... It does makes more sense when there is an order to the sounds as in the case with music and not just noise or abstract sound to evoke a long dormant memory or reflex.

And music being an easy & well known mnemonic (remember all those school rhymes), should only make it easy for my awestruck brain to make sense, every time it sings along a whole song without missing a beat or word, when that from a dusty memory, plays somewhere even I have no memory of actually listening to it ever.

My family was quite into Music when I was a child.  Our pursuits of music in its various forms have reduced and we almost do nothing but listen and may be share playlists these days. (As I'm sure is the case with most of us with "busy" lives making a living...) 

Today I got reminded of Meera Bhajan songs by LataMangeshkar (apparently recorded in the year 1978, I just came to know) that my mom used to listen to a lot.

And the surprise in store was that I could remember every song (and even the little breathing pause she takes in one of the songs which got recorded mistakenly.... :))

Similarly, this past week I was listening to quite a few of the old Indian Music either from Movies or those sung by the greats from their 'singing for Indian Movies' careers.

And some of these songs I still have not seen videos of, hardly ever heard them on radio or cassettes (given these are easily 40-60 years old) but I could remember (if not sing) every little 'nuance and tricky trek on the notes' along and at the exact places.

Always a pleasant surprise when that happens!

But a scent evoking memories is a different story altogether for me... This is something that I can't explain really well. 

The memories it brings back are sharp but still shadowy...

I wish I knew how to tune in to this and figure out the teasing memory... 

I've sometimes stopped in my tracks, trying to really reach out and snatch at the memory when a scent hits me bringing back half a story.

Sometimes it's like a puzzle, dropping a piece at a time, right on my head so it would jolt me (to being awareof it?) but pieces not always of the same puzzle.  

This is one of the most intriguing experiences.  Makes me curious (obviously), aware (of some foggy memory residing in my head), zoned out (from the present trying to remember the past), sad (when not able to completely recall) and all of this at the same time. 

Not to sound like a creep, I am pretty confident that everyone has these experiences especially if one has moved around a lot or has seen a lot of changes in life.  Some are just more aware of it, some less.

Who knows, may be I am just connecting to my 'present' on a parallel universe... ;)

Now not just memories but there's another activity of the ever busy neurons that intrigue me...

When I feel emotionally overwhelmed while I watch an extraordinary performance of any kind.

Idol and Talent shows are my best and worst entertainment in this sense.

I absolutely don't mind this in the confines of my own house and that of my loved ones, definitely a nuisance when I am out and about.

The best way to become the butt of jokes when among friends... Huff!!!

Well, memories and emotions are/were always my favourite topic of discussion even if it was only in my own head.

May be they are overrated like people say but I am sure I will always stay fascinated by them!!

What pad??

I do not remember how I got introduced to this new friend but I did.

And we have been thin and thick over time... WATTPAD

I am pretty sure there are scores of Apps out there that does the same thing, may be some better and some worse.

This one does enough for me... For now.. Thought I should write about it before I tire and move on to something else...

It's been both good and bad. Bad being I don't read or finish the 'hard' books anymore and I get quite distracted with this when I am supposed to be doing other things... Like work for a living...

But well...even with 'hard' books I did that so this is only making it easier to do... The frequency of the crime is the only thing increasing not the crime or the gravity of it ;)

Now going for the good things:

I am usually slow in exploring things say an app. I don't just go in and try every feature on the day 1, just because...

My enthusiasm to explore is usually overtaken with a fascinating feature and there it stops till something bores me of it or if I feel like taking a break.

So the point is if you are looking for a review of the App and all its features then  I'm sorry this will be a disappointment.

Now there, that said...

WATTPAD has scores of people like you and me writing on it.  Anything and everything they feel like, stories, poems, shorties of any sort, series, read soaps where they publish the story in parts every week or every two days or any which way they prefer.

And then people like you and me read them, rate, 'fan' as the wattpadians call, even comment at any point in the story giving it good and bad feedback then and there!  

When you think about it, it's quite the same formula.  Writer's and readers social media.  Really.

You post, we read, follow, comment, vote etc.., But the opportunity like never before for budding writers to get live feedback, giving them a chance to change things to suit the mood.  And for established writers to gauge the reaction of the crowd.

Yes in a way I was debating with myself if this was truly good.  If you think about that was the beauty of writing, you write what you imagined and people either accept or reject. That makes you a true competitor or candidate.  Not knowing the judges preferences even as you are competing.  Oh well, I know, I am an idealist sometimes!!!

But what I noticed is all these 12 and 14 year olders writing! I just absolutely love that idea. A platform for children to cultivate an interest in writing.  

I've read several books on this App, the good, the bad and the ugly.

As far as I've checked the writing part of the app seems to be quite basic but again I have not really forayed into this yet.

This is more from me as a reader...

I think there could be more work on the writing part as well as privacy settings.

An app that is certainly keeping me more than just company! :)

P.S:

I almost forgot that it also allows other languages apart from English to be written in and read in.  I couldn't find any written in Tamil yet though.

Oh and it has loads of free ebooks and classics available too!

It's Cold... A Perpspective

Every single person out walking, from little kids to old women...are smoking!

Morning Potty Philosophies

Morning Potty has always been a time for thought... I have always found them to be my most creative and imaginative thought process time... It's almost as if you are asleep and dreaming solutions to your everyday problems or searching for an inner meaning to even the smallest of things in life that you wud usually ignore...

Right from my childhood days of indian commode habits I remember using this time to experiment with my various muscles and joints, in my legs, trying to see how long they hold still, when exactly do they start hurting, how much water I am using and how efficiently can I use the water while I also keep a constant flow to keep the commode from drying up...

Recently facebook, whatsapp and ebook readers (and some games too yes) have stolen this precious time from my brain exercise schedule I realise...sadly... 

Potty in this era of smartphones, has changed from being 'an extremely private and intimate time spent by a person completely inside their head and body, pushing out creative thoughts and 'not so creative' (some may disagree) body excrements' to a time when we connect with family and friends... 

It is not even funny anymore and in many cases true even, if you were to imagine your friend on their respective bathrooms and replying to your messages and watching the videos you shared...which is sad... Not just because it's not funny...

That said, try as I may, my hand automatically picks up my smartphone the minute I feel my bladder full or my rectum signal...

Times when I realize my battery is dead but I need to potty are almost emergencies where I borrow Suresh's phone shamefacedly (for the fact that I forgot to charge it).

From a girl who never opened her mouth to respond to any questions/conversations or provocations from outside the door while at potty to one who utilises her time on the potty connecting with people vie e-media is quite a (still quiet) transformation that I believe many women of my age and era wud agree...

And in fact this blog and the thoughts for it started this morning while at potty... 

Now what prompted me to write was a little insect I killed because I couldn't watch it buzzing around me... All I had to do was pour a few drops of water over it and it fell down twitching.  Then I couldn't watch it die nor accept that I did something that bad that I was torn between letting it go and ending its suffering (yes mahatma's words - or so I have been told - echoed in my mind) and I poured more water on it swearing (for the thousandth time in my life) that I wud never do that again...

So I was going to post on FB at once of my 

Morning Potty realisation #10000 or something...

One who controls the urge to kill an insect just because it's buzzing around or in sight is a person of supreme self control! 

One who does not feel the need in the first place to kill an insect just because it's buzzing around or in sight is a saint!

One who tries to get the insect out or find a way to let it out without harming it is a supreme being!

This does not include non veg food. I am talking about killing insects just because you see them or because they are flying around (and again you see them)...

(Based on the famous padayappa lyrics of the song 'vetrikkodikattu')

(Lines of the song)

இன்னொர் உயிரைக் கொன்று புசிப்பது மிருகமடா!

இன்னொர் உயிரைக் கொன்று ரசிப்பது அரக்கனடா!

யாருக்கும் தீங்கின்றி வாழ்பவன் மனிதன்...

ஊருக்கே வாழ்ந்து உயர்பவன் புனிதன்!!

(Lines of the song transliterated)

Innor uyiraikkondru pusippadu mirugamada!

Innor uyiraikkondru rasippadu arakkanada!!

Yaarukkum theengindri vaazhbavan manidan!

Oorukkae vaazhnthuyarbavan punidan!!

(Lines of the song translated)

Who kills another life (form) to eat is an animal!

Who kills another life (form) and enjoys is a demon!

Who lives without harming another life (form) is a human...

Who lives for (the good of) other life (forms) is divine!

But then it also occurred to me that even this has an exception.  Two... No some exceptions... Or may be I am just not a person of supreme self control.

And in my mind the exceptions are:

Mosquitos 

Cockroaches

Rats/Some viscious spiders and poisonous insects where it's either that dead, or you!!

Definitely in that order...

Definitely won't add lizards to the list...they are NOT harmful usually...

Thankfully though, for now I don't suffer the exceptions... But I know this is a global problem... Like poverty and illiteracy... 

So there goes my Morning Potty Realisation for the day number #ohsomanythatidontkeeptrack

The first reaction to NZ

A quiet seclusion.  A writer's paradise. A wintry sun but bird songs and cold hands. 

Houses undecided of the past or of future?! with their red roofs, large glass windows and spacious lawns but erected on and built in with modern household.

A long walk unto the beautiful skyline but on perfect roads and with whizzing cars.

Modern do I call this, or old, a glimpse into the future may be even...hopefully?!

Posting an old draft #unknown

The simple things that I've lost to:

Digital age? 

Cognizance of depleting natural resources?

Internetization of the world? 

Smart phonization of my life?

I don't know exactly which but they have compounded to the effect of, my losing touch with the tiny, simple pleasures...or even the desire for them.

For instance...

doodling on a piece of paper (/eraser/wall/water/back of a friend - any flat surface really)

This is such a lost art to me.  This simple silly thing that usually gets us a dose of 'scolding' from a teacher/parent/even an annoyed friend in the last case... Do kids do this at school after they have been introduced to the horrors of wasting paper and/or (the horror of) addictive, immersive smartphones?

I don't know... Well you do have apps to doodle with... But eh, isn't that the point?

Reading books let alone reading books while waiting for things...

Even though I try to go back to reading books (have successfully managed to read a few) I know I don't read as many or as immersed as I used to...

My attention span has reduced clearly and my smartphone does a good job of keeping me even from starting to read. If I've got just a few mins somewhere I know carrying a smartphone is much lighter and doing something with (even reading on it) is quicker and easier to leave when I have to than if I started with a book. I know I can't just read a page and stop if I have to (and it's relatively bulky)!!  Or atleast this is how the smartphone pro part of my brain argues (and mostly wins) over the meek and shy book loving part of my brain. :(

I salute the people who still manage to read a whole lot inspite of being gadget rock stars too of which I am certainly neither... 

Hard Love...

Love is a lot of hard work made to look easy... with a smile or a touch or a word or a thought be it real or imagined! 

ஆங்கிலத்தூசுப்படிந்து

நீலக்கடலாம் வானம் அதன் அழகு தேக்கும் கடற்கரை மணலாம் சேர்ந்துநிறக்கும் சீர்மேகம்...
இவை இருந்தும் நல்லதொரு கவிதைத் தொடுக்கவில்லை...

ஒற்றை மரம் ஒன்று போதிக்கக்காத்திருந்தும், செவிமடுக்க அங்கொரு புத்தனில்லாதது போல் -
கற்பனைகள் தீர்ந்துபோன வெள்ளைக்காகிதக்குப்பையென என் பழைய கவிமனம் ...
காகிதங்கள் நிரப்பா... மரம்வெட்டா..., சீர்த்திருத்தமாய் மறியல் செய்யும் என் சொற்க்கூட்டம்...

பாரதியவன் தமிழ்நேசமும் அதை வாழவைக்கும் அவன் ஆசையும் சொன்னக்  கவிஞர் சிற்பியவரின் கரகோஷத்திற்குறிய கவிதைப்புத்தகம்...
                                                                                                      கைப்பைக்குள்... -      அது

தமிழ்மறியும் அவலத்தை அவர்கள் அழகாய்ச் சொன்னதை, வண்டியின் குலுங்கலில் மிதமாய் என் கையிடித்து குத்திக்காட்டியது...

பாரதியின் புதுமைப்பெண்ணாய் நான் பெருமைக்கொண்டிருந்தக் காலம் மாறுதல் கொண்டது சரி...

அவன் பாடல்கள் போலில்லாவிடிலும் தமிழ் ரசிக்கக்கூட வார்த்தைகள் வற்றிப்போன இந்தக்காலமும் நோக்கிட நேரிற்றே...

காதல் வந்ததில் சிலக்காலம் கவிதை அலைகள் அடித்துபுரண்டோடியது...
ஆனால் காலப்போக்கில் கண்ட வாழ்க்கைச்சஞ்சலங்களில் சாதல் கண்டதே என் இனியத்தமிழ்...

மீண்டும் பெருவேனோ அந்த முக்கனிக்காலங்கள், தமிழ்ப்பழகிய இளமைக்காலங்கள்...!?

யாதுமறியாத பண்ணிரண்டில் யாப்புமறியாது எழுதத்தொடங்கிய என் சின்னப்பிள்ளை மிட்டாய்த்தமிழ்...
மிடுக்காய் உடுத்தியப்பட்டுச்சொக்காய்ப்போல் சோக்காய் அணிந்து ஊர்வலம் வந்த என் செல்லத்தமிழ்...

மழலையாய் மலர்ந்த, பிழையிருந்தும் மாசில்லாத்தமிழ்...

                ஆங்கிலத்தூசுப்படிந்து மூலையில் ஒதுங்கிய என் பிள்ளைத்தமிழ்...

இப்பொழுது வெளுக்க முயற்சித்துக்கொண்டிருக்கிறேன்...

                                                                                                                            வருவாயோ?

முழுத்தூய்மையுடன் இல்லாவிடிலும் எனை வளர்த்தத்தத்தாய்மையுடன்....
             
                                                                                                         என் தாய்த்தமிழே...!!!

Note: I wrote as usual on a bus ride back from my native that I was recently on a visit to.  The scenic dryness usually brings forth some thoughts and words as id this time but i realized how little I write both in terms of frequency as well as the quality.  To top it, as mentioned had just done with the book - பாரதி, கைதி எண் 253 - by kavignyar Sirpi an of course had elements of influence from there both in the content as well as the style.

Disclaimer:
"ஆங்கிலத்தூசுப்படிந்து" is not intended to belittle English as a language, but merely to say that it has so seeped into crevices of the mother tongue that we have forgotten a lot of Tamil words and only know the English counterparts for daily use.

#DelhiGangRape

This question was haunting me the whole time I was following the news about the Delhi Gangrape Victim's condition but I never really came across an answer untill just now.

Why were her intestines removed? What could have led her to such huge amounts of infection?  I found the first clue when I read the iron rods used in the brutality is suspected to have caused the infection.  

But it did not answer how internal injuries/infection could have been caused by this - may be cuts and scratches came in contact.  Still how the intestines in particular? It did not add up.

And I was not surprised and nor should you be when I say I did not really imagine the answer though when I found it, it was obvious.  Of course!  But also, of course I did not imagine the answer!!! For it was the unthinkable!  Not even my lady-colleague who I called to show the article had imagined the answer.

I am not sure if this is being dumb or naive or what but that is probably how most of us felt - because this is unthinkable!

I found the answer here:

http://health.india.com/diseases-conditions/delhi-rape-case-why-such-brutality/

"Picture this – A 23-year-old girl with dreams of a great future shifts to Delhi from her hometown for further studies. She’s travelling in a bus with a friend when four men assault the duo with an iron rod and proceed to rape the girl with such unspeakable brutality that would make you shudder.

The girl is now in such a ‘critical’ condition that she needs a ventilator to breathe. The men not only raped her repeatedly but also beat her with a blunt object and shoved it into her vagina leading to multiple injuries all over.

Dr B. D. Athani, medical superintendent at the Safdarjung Hospital in Delhi said ‘She has sustained serious abdominal and genital injuries. It seems she was repeatedly hit with a blunt object on her abdomen or an object was shoved into her private parts. She has several injury marks on her body but the injury to the intestines has created a life-threatening condition. The girl has been operated on and large portions of her intestines were removed. She has lost a lot of blood but has regained consciousness."

I don't care about the fact that I am at office and I am welling up but now I fully comprehend the meaning of the description/compliment/admiration - A very brave girl - that is being rained on the victim.  

Even without the knowledge of the "how" the girl's intestines were damaged I already understood when they called her brave.

But this, this is enormous!!! I Salute her and I sincerely hope no one else gets is put in a spot as this which would require them to be so "brave".

And then, when not knowing the whole of the gory details I was already chanting - 'castration and may be even let to bleed to death' ----- not just for these bastards but for that matter any of the species roaming this planet violating from little children to adult women (sometimes even Men).  And now, knowing what I do..... 'death by castration' - fully justified...

Why be kind to the beasts by doing it chemically which is not only painless but also temporary?!

And how naive had I been when I thought I saw shame, guilt, fear, embarrassment in the eyes of a couple of guys who happened to unknowingly stand too close to me in a busy bus stop and I turned - with all that fear and vigilance of a woman on her own at a bus stop "as late as" 8.30 PM - to stare at them and 'shoo them away'.

That was a day after the #DelhiGangRape news-rage and I thought, 'this protest and coverage is probably reaching people'.  

But it is not about this message reaching the already educated and gentle men having enough humility to feel sorry and ashamed for what some of their gender did (are still doing in many parts).

This is about it reaching those who are not in a position to understand what is going and what it could all mean - may be under the influence of drugs - or without education or brought up that would have taught them, women are no lesser than themselves and they are in fact inferior if they thought they could wield "power" by committing any degree of violation of a woman.

Can we really teach them? May be not, may be only fear of the law and consequences would keep them at bay - which at this moment is apparently too frail to lift a finger, too slow to catch the bastards or too blind to see the harsh reality when there is no "sufficient evidence".

But how do we make sure we do not have more and more of this in future?
Catch them young! Reach out to the schools - no not just to the girls in the school to tell them how to be vigilant and safe - but to the boys in various schools from govt institutions to international ones - talk to the young ones and teach them to respect the girls as their equals and not take advantage of the others' (usually) relative frailty.

More importantly let us not make the mistake of even jokingly show our own sons and daughters any partiality/inequality that would be the first seed in their hearts that would grow into the tree of unintended but culturally imbibed/inherited dominance and chauvinism.   

Let us not become the grandmothers/fathers who used to wait to offer the one chocolate left, to the beloved grandson and hide it from the granddaughter sitting right there.

And I was avoiding writing on this for so long because I know this might not really contribute towards the change but the article I mentioned above just broke my restraint. 

I am atleast voicing my opinion and I hope it reaches atleast a couple of people and propagates through the infinite and all pervading social network towards "Action" somewhere, may be even in the smallest of small ways.

I wish I could physically join the protesters at India Gate and was not aware of the protests that happened here in bangalore when it did. And I am sorry I did not.

And it was not too long ago when I was sharing my opinion - India would probably never come together in a grand scale for anything - when I was discussing the situation in Egypt.

Today it has, and I am proud of my fellow countrymen/women making the government stagger back a few steps and pause and think before they spoke a jumble of stupid consolation that they would otherwise throw at all too knowing population - that which knew the list of diplomatic government responses byheart and did not care to see which one was being used at that instance.

I hope that we do not stop at this protest and that we followup untill solid action is taken - in terms of amended bills, safer roads, more equal and educated society; in the reality of seeing these and other such bastards castrated/hung for their unspeakable crimes.

For this and other victims of such brutalities, the survivors and the eternally struggling... Support and salutes, good thoughts and prayers!

P.S: I wrote this last morning and now the victim is even more critical than she was then.  And there has probably more of this inhumane act occured around the world.  

I am not sure this piece is all coherent nor enough to have a title that would make it look nice.  This is just my shame, outrage and anger.

The more I think about the fact that I am unable to do anything about this and am comfortably going on with my routine - with only a conscience to quieten, no doubt with the help of the villainous cynic labelled 'the practical' of the two that live inside my all too accommodating/adjusting Indian mind - the more I am agitated about what has happened to the once hot blooded young feminist fighting in every little chance I used to get for the "little" rights and freedom of women!  Oh of course! I grew up... grew old more like...

What would happen if I (read: a woman with Social Responsibilities) abandoned it all and went in search of enlightenment at 25 (if I get stupid enough to do that?!)...!?

Back in secondary school at KV - Syllabus A, we had a poem called Yashodhara ka Vilaap (forgive any speling mistakes) - about which I remember the feeling expressed than any of the lines.

It was a beautiful poetry about this character called Yashodara who is none othr than Buddha's very own wife queen; about her sorrow that her beloved left her and their only son in search of "enlightenment". 

It was a poem that touched me deeply.  I couldn't find it onilne right now (though I would like that very much), else I would share here.

So just imagine a rich king, abandons his wife and young child, goes off in the search of some peace or knowledge or God, however one may interpret - all vey noble and grea on his part but what about his wife and child. 

In the case of Rama, he abandons his wife (and unborn child(ren) as it turns out), for keeping with the thoughts of his people and upholding so called "King's duties to his people".

Now let us pause and see what is expected of these women or rather what do they end up doing? Worship their beloved husbands; Not giving in to their personal feelings and respecting them still.  And th worst part is - these apparently, not out of any compulsion...

They may be big hearted, but I am not.  I do not think the same would have happened if the roles were reversed...

Thes husbands  respecting their wives, understanding the causes that led them to act like that if they did much less worship them...!? Nien!  I do not know what is root cause - society, chauvenism, inert human nature... Whatever it may be, I do not know nor want to get into those...

Well, am I happy to be in this century of modern household and understanding and Gamma men...?!  Yeah Baby, definitely. :) 

I know even now they would not really apprecate if I left my house/family/"responsibilities" and went in search of "enlightenment" but atleast they are adjusting enough and understanding enough when need arises for an onsite... :)

"Have I stopped living?!" List...

Here is a compilation I made in my bus journey in the morning, thinking about what to blog
- I am sorta pushing myself to blog once a day; trying to get back in touch with my writing side. . .

We will call it the list of "Have I stopped living?" or a "Have I let my heart grow too old?"

Agree or diagree to the below, honestly to yourselves and see if You have stopped living life yet!

-> You start feeling cynical or have a "mature distant eye" analyzing everything, when people speak around; thoughts of you own that you are not jumping to express at the first pause the other person gives in their sentence.

-> You start getting distracted with "how I am in a much more pathetic life than this person" thoughts when someone is sharing their problems OR in a "how I am better off" thoughts when somebody starts talking about how happy they are. Even if you do listen genuinely, still this thought lingers somewhere in a corner of your mind. 
(And this may or may not be the private thoughts mentioned in the previous point).
-> You do not exaggerate anything anymore, especially not for fun.

-> You stop getting visually excited about things/events; you try to keep a cool appearance throughout even when excited. 

-> Everyone you meet is not called a friend anymore, but falls under the category of an aquaintance or some such fancy levels of social circles.

-> You shrink your world to your priorities in work and loved ones.

-> You stop making new friends and struggle to keep in touch with the good old ones, as much as you used to before.

-> Your hobbies are no more that; you do not have time for those anymore.

-> You do not trust yourself too much anymore or have a lot of self doubts about your capabilities even for the smallest of things.

-> You stop appreciating yourself.  Or atleast think it unwise to admit it even if you did appreciate yourself for something.

-> You slowly stop appreciating nature or atleast you think you are too busy to do it. 

-> You still enjoy nature but you think you have other priorities and cannot "waste time" "right now" to appreciate it and keep it aside for later that never comes. 
-> But then if you stop a moment and think about it you know that you are wrong.

-> You stop appreciating your life. 

-> You feel jealous about or atleast Envy others often!

-> You feel lonely often.

-> Some you may agree to and some you may not; some you may even add to this list through your comments.

Independence - Life's Reward Structure

The problem with the people that love you/care about you is that they tend to not be able to accept the fact that you have grown up and/or that you are on your own, especially when you make decisions and choices that don't really go down well with them. 

Be it really big or really small, it is not - you did something like that because you made a conscious decision/choice - but were under a bad influence which lead you to do something like that, which you could not have conceived of by yourself, No!

The reason is simple, they cannot find fault with you, so it has to be someone or something else.  May be the friends, the various relationships with their environ, that may have put such thoughts and actions in them... But well, the hard truth is that, it is in most cases, not so!

There is this innate nature in human beings to gain independence in every form.  Entropy may be, showing up in its purest form!?  One wants to go his or her own way, learn things the hard way, even though there is this wisest person who could give you the best advise on the matter, right there, next to you in theform of a parent or a sibbling or a close friend.

But this may be out of various decisions/thought processes.  As in my case for instance, one may just want to learn it the hard way because there is a certain satiety associated with self learning even masochistic sometimes. There is a certain pride associated with "self" people and again the society or the upbringing is to be blamed for this thought structure too.  Independence, has some respect, some glamour to it, though people do not want it for their children all too soon (and it is almost always too soon).  So one may want to prove to their kin and kind that they are strong by trying to be independent and ends up growing a fondness to it, an attachment that becomes a fixation.  A reward structure.  Like a hard earned penny or something.  The learning that comes out, a "life's hard truth" that stares out at you at the end of a difficulty, may not be very sweet, but you will never forget the bitter sting and hence the learning either.  Or the reward it brought to you in any form/degree of satisfaction.

Is it wise to let people go and make all the bad decisions and learn by themselves, especially when it is your beloved child? Of course not, but you may have to let some learnings pass by, without your interference, and teach themselves to your loved ones, the hard way or otherwise!  Standing aside and watching your child grow up and try to fight life is a part of parenting too and the challenge is to keep them on their feet while they do, giving them the push without them realizing it, by a simple process - Trusting them to do it!

Trust works wonders... Trust me on this...

P.S: As always all these thoughts bring a stronger fear out, rather makes me brace myself to face a stronger challenge, in my future - Parenting!

Heights of Falling out of Tuch with being online...

I was groping around for the "New Mail" Tab while on GMAIL... And realized I prefer using the LN Domino Web Browser these days.... :(  SAD and PATHETIC....